I have a running list on my phone titled “Quotes”. This is a note dedicated to various (you guessed it) quotes on various things, ranging from therapy to philosophy to politics and on and on. These are pieces of insight I have gained over the years coming from various books, TV shows, movies, and talks with friends that have stuck with me over the years. Sometimes I like to look back through these quotes when I feel the need for inspiration or just need a little bit of an emotional boost. Today, I wanted to share some of the most important quotes that I have in this note and show what I believe to be the therapeutic takeaway!

“I’m here to get it right, not to be right.”

This is on we all need to hear. So often in conversation, we have so much that is getting in the way of us truly connecting with one another. The many years of practice you have communicating with your parents in the same way over and over. The emotional flood that hits you when you feel the disconnect between you and the person you are speaking to. The list can go on and on. I believe this quote serves as a reminder of what our goal is in conversation: to feel heard and to feel understood.

“Can a man be brave if he is afraid? I believe it is the only time he can be brave.”

This is a fantastic quote from the one and only Game of Thrones. I know it is said in the books, and I believe it is said in the show. I absolutely LOVE this quote, because it takes an angle that I think is applicable in so many regards. In addition, it’s just so true. Bravery only means something if there is something to overcome, otherwise its just a lack of fear. There is no challenge, and thus no bravery. Likewise, I draw the parallel between this and strength often. I often hear that vulnerability is a weakness and should be replaced with strength. What I argue? You cannot show true strength without vulnerability. Would we think a power lifter picking up a 1lb weight in the weight room to be a feat of strength? I doubt it. It is only when we see the athlete lift hundreds of pounds that we are taken aback. When the person is challenged, yet comes through. If strength is letting the world and your emotions not effect you (which we are lying to ourselves if we believe this to be true), then are we truly showing a feat of strength? True strength is the challenge, showing the side of your self that is vulnerable, letting your friends and family know what hurts. What your dreams are. What your hopes are. Facing the challenge of sharing the inner pieces of you with another reflects true strength.

“The limits of my language mean the limits of my world.”

This one hit me hard. I cannot recall who stated this quote, but I remember I came across it in Brene Brown’s Atlas of the Heart. It is simple, elegant, and beautiful. When I read this, I had to re-read it a couple times for it to truly sink in. If I were to rephrase this quote, I would say “when I do not know how to articulate what I am feeling, to put words to my thoughts, and a voice to my inner self, I am very limited on what I can do in interacting with the world, building relationships, and having long-lasting connections with others”. How can we move through the feelings of abandonment if we barely know how to identify sadness? How can we feel understood and heard if we do not know that when your partner cracks a specific joke, it really gets under your skin, but you do not know why? Understanding yourself means giving yourself a language to articulate you. If you can discover what this looks like, not only will you be able to better communicate to others your experience, but you will be able to be more at peace with yourself as well.

These are just a few quotes that have really stood out to me and have a special place in my heart. I hope they do the same for you. I hope they fill you with a sense of humility, a force of strength, and an inspiration of understanding for the journey into your own mental health. I feel the best way to end this is with one final quote, and perhaps my favorite quote of all time:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your ‘playing small’ does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”