In recent years I have made it a priority to start reading more than I had been up to that point (which at that time was none, so I could only go up from there!). What I wanted to do was go beyond the many textbooks and educational books that I would read through going through college and getting my masters. So about five years ago, I decided I would always keep a book on me at all times and that I would read it every day. I am happy to say that I have stuck with the reading and have come to enjoy it more and more, always looking forward to the next book I get to start. During this course of time, I have read a lot of useful counseling tips and theory that I still use with my clients today. But one very tiny book (65 pages, to be exact) has completely transformed how I view my work with clients as well as conduct my own life. The book is called: Redefining Anxiety by Dr. John Delony.

I am going to start off by saying this: please read this book. It’s very short and easy to read, and I would recommend it to anyone who is struggling with their mental health, has been diagnosed with anxiety, or for someone who just wants to acquire new perspectives and skills. But as for this article, I am going to go into the overall purpose of Redefining Anxiety and leave you with what I think is the most important, actionable takeaway from this read.

Redefining Anxiety is a quick read that aims at addressing four anxiety related myths. First, it tackles the idea that anxiety is a disease or genetic condition, and that people who experience anxiety are destined for a life of struggle and chaos. Second, he moves into the myth that anxiety can only be cured with medication. He then goes on to challenge how we view anxiety as an identity or destiny and talks about the dangerous side of diagnosis. Finally, he tops it off by addressing the myth that we can have and do it all at the same time, without trade-offs and consequences. Throughout this entire process, he keeps the rebuttals to these myths clean. Challenging the first myth by showing us we are not machines with parts separate from one another, but rather beings that require connection and understanding that each part of how we view health (mental, physical, spiritual, emotional, etc.) are interwoven. He then describes how medication is a fantastic tool, but not a destination. Medication used correctly gets you to a place where you can function and do the true work to understand and work with your anxiety. It doesn’t stop the pain of your past. As he puts it: “Medication is not a long-term solution. You are.” In the final two points he demonstrates that we are more than our anxiety and our pain, and that we must be intentional with what goes into our ecosystem (physical health, thoughts, actions, hopes, etc.).

The latter half of the book goes into both short-term and long-term goals for addressing and healing from anxiety. To convince you to read the book (in case you aren’t sure already), I am going to give just one goal that I felt was the most important takeaway for the general reader. Here is the advice Dr. Delony gives his readers (and the same advice I give my clients): Slow down and listen to the alarms. We are so quick to either shut down our anxiety or let our anxiety take such forceful control of our emotions that it never gets addressed. It is important that in these moments where we are feeling anxious and panicked to get curious. What were you doing just now that brought on this anxiety? What thoughts are you telling yourself? What feelings are you experiencing? What do you feel in your body?

Your anxiety is an alarm, screaming at you that’s something is wrong. Instead of slamming the door or running away in a frenzy, take a moment of self-reflection and listen to it. That is your body doing its best to keep you safe. The best you can do is work with it, not fight against it.  

I hope this blog post provides you with enough information (and fantastic writing) to influence you to give this book a read. It was truly eye-opening, and I cannot tell you how many individuals I’ve worked with that thought about anxiety from this perspective and seen a shift from powerlessness to powerful.

If you want to give it a go, you can find a copy here:

https://www.amazon.com/Redefining-Anxiety-What-Isnt-Your/dp/194212144X/ref=asc_df_194212144X/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=533463736693&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=9043936517265482334&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9027296&hvtargid=pla-1122673868339&psc=1